25 Lives That Have Touched Mine for Good

The challenge for day 2 of Confronting the Quarter Life Crisis is to count my blessings in terms of the many friendships and associations I have enjoyed that have changed my life for the better. The purpose is to cultivate gratitude, because I find when I focus on the simple things that I have to be thankful for, I notice how lucky I am and focus less on what I don't have.

I started off by listing people who have been close friends over the years-- people with whom I have shared many long nights, deep-rooted fears, obsessive crushes, personal accomplishments, in short, my heart. I then made a list of all the people who have helped me to get to where I am now, or who have pushed me to become better. My mind was flooded with faces, names, memories of people who have at one time or another, meant so much to me. I realized I would have to cheat a little bit, grouping some people together and leaving others off the final list, because I have literally thought of hundreds of people who have impacted my life for the better.

Here, I narrowed it down to 25 friends and mentors who have truly blessed my life and enriched my days. To all on this list and the many others who deserve my gratitude, I say Thank You for being a part of my life.

1. My parents 

There are numerous cousins, grandparents, aunts, and other family members that bear mentioning on a list such as this, but as a rule, I stuck to non-family just so I could take stock of those who love me or help me without any familial obligation. My parents are the one exception to this because I would be incredibly remiss if I did not include them because they have had the biggest impact on my life by far, through their unconditional support and guidance. The sacrifices they have made to help me get what and where I want are not insignificant. They laid the foundation for my success and held me to a higher standard my whole life than anyone else ever did, or probably ever will, and I cannot thank them enough for it.

2. My missionaries-- Rich, Jake and Ryan 

Who would have thought that two goofy 20-year olds knocking on my door would change my life forever? I certainly couldn't have pictured how different my life would look five years down the road when Jake and Rich first showed up, but I am so glad they found me. I'm even more glad that I've been lucky to have them as regular fixtures in my life throughout my time in Utah. Between the two of them they have been there for all of my church firsts-- my first time at General Conference, my first time at the temple, the day I received my endowment. They've also been incredible friends and supporters-- not many people would drop everything to travel 16 hours each way in the dead of winter to help with a family crisis. My Canadian Thanksgivings will not be the same without one or both of them at my table!

As for Ryan, he came along and answered questions I didn't even realize I had. It was he who helped me to truly uncover my faith, and "shake off the chains" of doubt and insecurity I'd bound myself in... and he alone understands how incredibly cold my baptismal waters were.

3. My Girls

No words really necessary, because no words are good enough. The countless memories speak for themselves. Thanks for being crazy right along with me.

I would get low in a kitchen with you girls any time, anywhere!

4. "Our" boys

Anyone should be so lucky as to have four quality guys like this as friends. The last two years have been filled with soooo many hilarious memories and all-around good times (minus the parts where you all watched Firefly and I just couldn't handle it). The invention of Hammerball will forever stand out as a highlight.

Jeff, you have a natural ability to bring people together, and an innate sense for how to help people deal with things... smashing and shooting things always go over well in my book, and I appreciate every ride I ever got on the back of your bike. Seth, you lovable cyborg, it took me a while to really get you at all, but I know our quirky group dynamic isn't the same without you. I loved watching the crazy come out of you in Canada. Nathan, hopefully some day you'll be able to lean on us or any of your future friends as much as we lean on you. Also, you will always be Sexy Frodo in my books. Andrew, you put up with a lot from me and you never let me down. Please stay just as kooky as you are... just try to avoid the blanket of shame!

5. Larry Hope 

I was a high school senior who had recently realized she didn't really want to be a neonatal pediatrician when Mr. Hope suggested I try freelancing for the local paper. He couldn't have known then that he was helping me to discover a true talent, passion and purpose that would set a general direction for my life.

6. Kaye Nelson 

When I finally got back into a newsroom at the end of my second year at BYU, I felt like I had found my way home. As editorial manager of the lab, Kaye was a supervisor, mentor and friend and talking to her was something I always looked forward to about spending time in the Newsroom. Even now that we've both moved on, she is a source of support and encouragement. I have her to thank for submitting my work into contests that got me my first Society of Professional Journalist awards, and it is her kind words of recommendation that helped me get accepted to Columbia.


7. Shaun and Lisa

Shaun, from the day I started at the Northern View you gave me room to take initiative and led by quiet example. You cheered me on, gave me feedback I needed to grow and eventually even took me to task when I needed it. I so enjoyed our office chats-- the regularity at which we would spin in our chairs to talk about some fact or event or another that we'd come across and made our minds run. You taught me so much without ever really trying to.

Lisa, you've never been afraid to be goofy and playful, but you're also willing to share the deeper, more serious parts of yourself. You showed me what it means to own who you are and I'm looking forward to the next opportunity that we have to get together to shoot the breeze and toast ourselves with milk-dunked double-stuffed oreos.

8. Shari Delong 

Shari, for the better part of the past year you have been my roommate, my closest friend and confidant, my travel partner and my sounding board. I so admire your generosity and the way you are always thinking about others. I have also really appreciated your frankness and honesty, and I miss our random outings and conversations stretching late into the night. I will always remember sharing my Columbia acceptance moment with you.


9. Julie and the Kids (and Kurt, too, for that matter) 

Julie, when your family "adopted" me, I felt like I truly had a home within the church. Your kids bring so much light into my life, and you have been such an example to me. Thank you for accepting me with all my flaws and being a friend and a sister.

10. Bekah and Katharine 

Bekah and Katharine, I wouldn't have made it as far as the baptismal font if it weren't for each of your friendship. I'm so glad it was you by my side when I got my patriarchal blessing, Bekah, and I can never read it without thinking of your laughter about a young man being "prepared" for me. You are both among the choicest bacon bits on the salad of my life.


11. Celine Weisgerber

When I first met Celine I was certain she wasn't the type of girl I would ever be friends with, but she surprised me by becoming the closest thing to a sister I'd ever had at that point and I learned a lot about judging a book by its cover. I have never had so much fun with just one other person. The New Years she and I spent with a walkman and a bottle of fake champagne in a camper trailer in southwestern France will forever be one of my fondest memories.

12. Ashley and Kajsa 

I love these girls so much! Both of you have been such great blessings to me.  It's funny now to think about our sketchy first impressions, Ashley, because we turned out to have more in common than we ever could have known. I could never tell you how much it meant to me to have you as my escort in the temple. I wish I could have been there to celebrate you and Tom, but I am so thrilled that this is where life has taken you (and to be able to say that I played some small role in the beginning). And Kajsa, I will never have a better visiting teacher. I am so glad that I get to remember your special day as my very first sealing ceremony.

13. World Youth Congress Journos

Tom, Kelly, Cherise, Laura, Cansu, Anita, Anna, Pochi, Montassir....

There was so much love going around in Quebec in 2008. It's crazy how in just two weeks people from such different parts of the world can grow to feel so close. I had the time of my life in Quebec, even the sleepless nights spent trying to get the design and printing of the paper done up so there would be fresh stacks of our handiwork ready for all the delegates in the morning. I'm so glad you all were by my side!

14. Camille Cole 

SOUL SISTER! I love you. I miss you. 


15. Donya and Phil

Most of the four months I spent at UNBC are a blur of bad decisions, but I had a blast with the two of you. You gave me grounding while I was tottering on the brink and I think back with a smile on our stupid antics, things like dressing Mike up in full drag and sharing my pitifully small bed with Phil when he was too drunk or lazy to make it upstairs to his own room.

16. RJ Sparling

I can, and have, gone to you with anything and you have always been there with open ears and arms, and a wise word or two. You've been honest with me and shared so much of yourself. I luv ya like crazy!

17. Tina Gladstone

You are a light that never failed to put a smile on my face with a ready laugh and an understanding of how to enjoy the simple things. You made a difficult summer more than bearable and you were right there by my side, no judgment to be had, when I messed up big.

18. My French Friends

Claire, Anne-So, Richard, Mikael, Clementine, Bea, Arnaud, Pierre-Henri, David, Yves, Jeremy, Adrian, Thomas, Benoit, Gregoire, Gaetan... and the list goes on. 

All the other exchange students talked about how hard it was to be 16 or 17, living half way around the world, but you all made my experience phenomenal. I became my own person in Upper Normandy.

19. Tom

My bestie. You are a dork and a cynic and we have had so much fun together. Who goes on a 52-hour road trip to see Paul Brandt with my parents? We do!

20. The Bucket List Crew

Older version, newer version... both I love to pieces. You guys made my last year in Provo awesome. Regina, always with a ready ear. Jamie, with a smile. Tammy, with something hilarious to say. Ben-- the only guy I know who will own his love for Twilight. Bryan- a kindred soul. Jacob- The only thing keeping us apart being your aversion to pulling hair ;) 

Also, Jon, Michael K., Michael S., Joe, Josiah-- thanks for adding to my store of great memories!

21. Kayla

The sister I never had. When I think of Kayla I think of summer days cruising out to Ridley, listening to Taylor Swift, pulling donuts in my piece of crap car and the time we sent a message in a bottle.

22. Isabella

Remember that time we got into a car accident the week after you got your N? Like, totaled the car and then went bowling? You are one of the few from my high school days I still truly count among my friends. You have always let me be me and never made me feel like I should be something different. I'm so happy for you and the path you've charted for yourself with school, nursing, getting married, and now motherhood. 

23. Lindsay

You are so very funny and clever. I love your creativity and sense of fun.

24. Joe Opatowski

I met Joe in the PRSS band room when I was 15. He'd delivered a rousing speech to the whole school that morning, and was meeting with a small group of us in the afternoon for leadership training. I can't remember if I'd been singled out by the school or chose to participate because well, that's always been my personality, but I do remember that when I left school that day I thought about the world and my own potential to affect it in a way I hadn't before. I knew I could never not care again. He was just a genuinely good guy, who continued to offer personalized words of encouragement and advice in the following months and it crushed me to learn he had been killed by a drunk driver in 2004. Joe was the person who first introduced me to Free the Children, which leads me to...

Last, but definitely not least...

25. Craig Kielburger

On my journalism writing test for admission to Columbia University I was asked who in the world I would most like to interview and why. Without hesitation, I put Craig Kielburger-- the only person on this list I have not actually met or interacted with. Craig started Free the Children when he was 12 years old and he has since become a member of the Order of Canada, and a Nobel Peace Prize Nominee. But what makes him stand out to me is his incredible passion and persistence. His vision of collective participation emphasizes global citizenship and the power of the individual, and empowers children and youth to be agents of change in a very tangible way. Given that Free the Children really embodies all of the causes that get me fired up, he's a bit of a personal hero. And, well, look at that smile! Mark my words, someday I will get my chance to pick his brain!